002 The Willingness to be Misunderstood
If you want to make a difference…
If you want to make a difference, there will come a time when the Level of your Voice must grow to match the Level of your Competence.
You must not only be good; you must also be known for being good.
The inevitable consequence of greater Voice is that your Competence will be questioned and your words will be misunderstood… simply because there are more words for people to understand.
Being misunderstood is the tax you pay for pursuing a vision that many can’t and won’t ever see.
It is the trade-off we make to belong to ourselves.
So… What if misunderstanding was the new variable of success?
Rather, what if a willingness to be misunderstood was the new variable of success? Especially, a willingness to be misunderstood by the people you want to understand you.
Be aware enough to feel the glances - but self-assured enough not to put stock in them.
Welcome to being in the arena. It’s where you belong.
Practices for You:
- Notice whom you crave approval from. Whose laugh do you look for when you make a joke? Whose nod or shake of disapproval do you look for when you say something vulnerable?
- Create a list of the people whose input on your life is consistently meaningful and valuable. Note: This list is usually around 10.
- Bring awareness to where and when you unintentionally insert caveats or minimizers in your speaking. This is one subtle way you dull and sanitize the impact of your words. Sometimes, softening our speaking can be strategic and invite more dynamic conversation, but we often do this absent-mindedly.
- Example minimizers: Just; Only; Sort of; Like; Does that make sense?; It’s just a thought; Kind of; Thanks for coming to my Ted talk
Bring the Juice,
Seb
Authentic Business Tip: Generating Business During the Holiday Season
November means it is officially the start of the holiday season. If you are US-based, you’re likely intuitively aware of this cycle of business. Here’s a general timeline I use:
- Nov 1 - Thanksgiving: Active
- Nov 25 - Dec 2: INACTIVE [Week of Thanksgiving]
- Dec 2 - Dec 15: Active
- Dec 15 - Jan 15: INACTIVE [All of the Holidays]
During the inactive periods, decision-makers are often offline and unreachable. And decisions and work don’t get done.
Bottom Line: Folks spend A LOT of money during this period
There is both opportunity and tact inherent in this period. It’s best to move mindfully.
- According to Adobe Analytics, last year shoppers spent $9.8 billion online on Black Friday, up 7.5% from the previous year and U.S. retailers also saw a 9.6% increase in online sales on Cyber Monday to $12.4 billion (RetailDive)
- For organizations, many companies and government agencies have a “if you don’t use it, you lose it” policy in their budget and are looking to make purchases NOW for work executed in 2025.
If you are a coach or consultant, now is a great time to further the sales/enrollment conversations with individuals and organizations you want to work with.
My Lessons Learned
Here's how to strategically place yourself to generate business and maintain boundaries around the holidays.
- Build the relationship intentionally NOW. Schedule check-in calls during one of the active periods above. Most people prefer genuine pre-New Year ‘catch-ups’ to Q4 busy work.
- Don’t force what isn’t there - for your sake and theirs. December 31st is a made-up finish line… don’t rush the sales process or damage the relationship by rushing to close work before the New Year.
- Send clients and potential clients a personal holiday gift or thank you note. Send along something authentically you. Bonus points if it’s something that sits near their desk that reminds them of you when they see it.
- If you haven’t already, schedule your out-of-office responder and block your calendar for the days you plan to spend with friends and family. Protect that time away from work and give yourself something to look forward to.
Final Word
The impersonalization of AI and automation has the world zigging… so instead, zag. Developing deeper, more personal relationships with those whom we do business with requires us to be mindful of these relational cycles.
Looking ahead, I believe the premium on trusted relationships and kindness will never be higher.
How We Can Work Together
1.) Momentum: Finish the Year Strong starts Tuesday, Nov 12th [FREE Webinar Series]
Momentum is a 30-day live program designed to help you end 2024 with a bang and enter 2025 with powerful momentum. If you're a coach, consultant, or business owner... you qualify.
Over four weekly 60-minute live sessions, we’ll focus on:
- Reflecting on your wins and lessons from 2024
- Gaining clarity on your financial goals and numbers
- Setting a Strategic Vision for 2025
- Building support structures to sustain your success
The program runs from November 12th to December 10th. Sign up for free below 💥
2.) Authentic Business Mastery
Mastery is a 12-month, immersive mastermind program for coaches, facilitators, and service providers ready to reinvent their business for bigger results and deeper fulfillment. The next cohort begins in January 2025. Book a call here or reach out to [email protected].
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